Adventures in nursing...

When I was pregnant, I didn't know a ton about nursing (breastfeeding). I had seen a few moms nurse and knew I wanted to but that was about it. So I read a ton. I watched videos on the internet. I researched and researched. Surprised?

By the time S. came along, while I had learned a lot, I still hadn't actually nursed a child. My thoughts went like this. "I want to nurse my baby, and I will. Period."I knew it had the potential to be hard, but I was in.  We had a rocky start at the hospital- she was taken to the NICU for her first day (and I was told that the only way to give her the colostrum I was pumping was to bottle-feed, or they would have to go to a feeding tube!). Thankfully, we got the hang of things the next day (and had a wonderful nurse tell us about finger-feeding expressed milk), but it was not easy. I received conflicting advice from "experts." When I was engorged, some told me to pump more to relieve engorgement and others said don't. ( The "don'ts" were right since breastfeeding is  supply/demand...the more you pump/supply the more your body will make). I ended up so engorged I looked like I had rocks under my skin almost up to my neck.

But we learned together, S and I. We made it through my oversupply of milk, her refusing to nurse because she associated it with sleep (and heaven forbid we try to get Miss Busy to sleep!), teething, mastitis and plugged ducts. And here we are 14 months later and still going. And I still love nursing. I don't know how long we will keep this up, and that is ok. Sitting in our chair tonight,  I realized nursing has been good for both of us. I tend to be a "keep moving" kind of person. Slowing down can be hard. Once something is done, I am on to the next. But I can't do that when S wants mama-milk. I sit in our chair and look at her baby face and slowly unwind a bit. My timelines have to adapt to her needs. She is a busy busy busy little thing too, so this is cuddle time for us as well. When we are out, it is really hard for me to stop and sit in the car to nurse instead of heading directly home, but really, where is the rush? There isn't anything that can't wait a few minutes. Nursing slows me down, and that is good for all of us.

This is a hard subject for me because I have dear friends who haven't been able to nurse, despite incredible efforts. While I want to share my adventures in being a mom, and nursing has been a huge part of that, ultimately, nursing isn't what makes a Mom. Love your babies well, enjoy them and do what works for all of you.